A web comic of romance,
sarcasm, math, and language.

what-if.xkcd.com
This week: What would happen if everyone on earth stood as close to each other as they could and jumped, everyone landing on the ground at the same instant?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Scene:  A dark cave, profuse with spiderwebs, bones hanging in some of them.  A stick figure in a long flowing robe holds up a lantern in one hand; the One Ring is dangling from a necklace in the other.  In a large web before the figure, presumably written by the spider, are the words, “SOME PIG.”

Hover text: My all-time favorite example of syntactic ambiguity comes from Wikipedia: “Charlotte’s Web is a children’s novel by American author E. B. White, about a pig named Wilbur who is saved from being slaughtered by an intelligent spider named Charlotte.

 

Warning: This comic occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors).

A web comic of romance,
sarcasm, math, and language.

http://what-if.xkcd.com

This week: What would happen if everyone on earth stood as close to each other as they could and jumped, everyone landing on the ground at the same instant?

Scene: A page from an Eyelash Wish Log

Under the title, “Eyelash Wish Log,” is a small icon-like picture of a stick figure wearing a black hat, captioned “Wisher.”

To the right of the picture it reads

Wish Bureau ID#  21118378

Date Range: Jan-Apr 2012

Below is a table:

Date

Wish

Jan 09 Jan 12 Jan 15 Jan 19 Jan 20 Jan 28 Feb 05 Feb 06 Feb 08 Feb 12 Feb 12 Feb 19 Feb 23 Feb 27 Feb 29 Mar 07 Mar 15 Mar 23 Mar 29 Apr 02 Apr 07 Apr 08 Apr 15 Apr 22

That wishing on eyelashes worked A Pony Unlimited wishes Revocation of rules prohibiting unlimited wishes A finite but arbitrarily large number of wishes The power to dictate the rules governing wishes Unlimited eyelashes Wish-granting entities must interpret wishes according to intent of wisher That wish-granting entities be incapable of impatience Unlimited bread sticks Veto power over other’s wishes Veto power over others’ wishes and all congressional legislation The power to override any veto The power to see where any shortened URL goes without clicking The power to control the direction news anchors are looking while they talk The power to introduce arbitrary error into Nate Silver’s predictions A house of stars A universe which is a replica of this one sans rules against meta-wishes Free transportation to and from that universe A clear explanation of how wish rules are structured and enforced The power to banish people into the TV show they are talking about Zero wishes Veto power over clocks A Pokay ball that works on strangers’ pets

 

Hover text: Ooh, another one. Uh. . .the ability to alter any coefficients of friction at will during sporting events.

 

Warning: This comic occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors).